"And indeed we have made the Quran easy to understand and remember" Surah 54, Ayat 17,22,32,40

Bismillah,
After several failed attempts to try to sleep, I finally gave up.Subhanallah its been almost 20 days and I still haven't been able to regulate my sleep pattern. The other night I pretty much stayed up all but 2 hours hoping that if I was able to stay up all day, I could sleep for the greater part of the night. Well that planned failed and only made me feel like I was coming down with something. Alhumdulillah I feel much better after about 3 and a half hours of sleep, and I'm WIDE awake too:)
So Alhumdulillah today will be my 4th day in the Quranic school. There the main focus is proper Tajweed (proper pronunciation of the letters during recitation). You all are aware that the reason why I'm here is to learn Quranic Arabic. Those were my intentions while in Jersey and I continue to renew my intentions as a reminder so I don't loose focus. That being said, I don't take studying lightly (inshallah my enthusiasm will remain HIGH). So yesterday I studied up until it was time for class, despite not sleeping, I was adamant to correct my mistakes I made the previous day. We'll lets just say I need my sleep prior to class, because yesterday wasn't a good day for me, But Alhumdulillah I got through it. Despite not speaking Arabic, I can see that my teacher is very gentle and patient, and easy going. I'm so thankful because if she was the stern and harsh type, I think it would be a bit overwhelming for me. Basically All she does is revise me as I recite, so that I'm saying everything properly. Subhanallah, I didn't realize that I was making so many mistakes on my pronunciation until now. Surprisingly when I start to recite I'm not nervous despite being the only American in the room, and not speaking Arabic.
So I walked in a bit tired but more ready then the previous sessions. I started to recite, and like before the teacher would stop me if I made a mistake, recite it properly, then have me repeat again. That happened several times, but then all of a sudden I felt myself fighting to hold back the tears. It reminded me of when I first landed in Medina after a tremendously long flight( and not a minute of sleep), to find out that my luggage was lost. Pure exhaustion to say the least. I knew that I was frustrated because I couldn't get the proper sound but the root of it was me being SOOOO darn tired. It took me a minute, but I managed to get myself together before a tear could fall:)After, she took my paper, wrote the scores down in Arabic, said a few words that I didn't understand,LOL then told me I was free to go.
I took the paper to my friend MT and she said that I got excellent scores....REallllllllly I thought to myself, for sure I thought I did bad after all the corrections, but clearly the teacher noticed that I studied:) What a relief.
I make Dua that Allah opens my heart for his powerful words and makes it easy for me. Now it seems like its so hard but Allah speaks the truth and in the Quran Surah 54, ayah 17,22,32,40 (chapter 54,verses 17,22,32,40) Allah says " And indeed We have made the Quran easy to understand and remember". Once I get over that hump, I have no doubt that It will be much easier, Inshallah. My father taught me from a very young age not to be a quitter, So I'm down until the wheels fall off:) It's so much easier to study for things you actually want to know about and that will be beneficial to you. I want to learn the words of Allah so that I can get closer to him, and so that Inshallah one day when I have children I'll have enough knowledge to teach them myself. Although it seems impossible sometimes, I actually look forward to accomplishing my goals.